Posts tagged dnr:

i fucking really hope i don't have fucking covid because someone forgot to wear a mask

i haven't slept in 24 hours so that could be it but idk

I think the worst part about living in a dystopia is realizing that I've always lived in one and was just too ignorant to realize it, even despite all of the bullshit my family has gone through. The schools I attended even did a decent job talking about how fucked up my country's past was, but I stubbornly clung to my idealism and the belief that people are good at heart. I no longer believe that anyone is inherently good or evil, but it is their environment that enables their morality.

And right now, we live in a society that enables suffering, ignorance, and cruelty. And I can't do anything about it.

Vote you say? Please.

When people around the world and in my country, mock or criticize people in our county for the shitshow we're living in, they don't realize that most people did not want it to be this way. The person I and millions of people voted for technically won, but our votes were nullified because of an outdated and corrupt system. We never really had a choice, just an illusion of one. My vote wouldn't matter even if I could vote and liked one of the candidates.

Protest only works if protesting is safe, and if powerful people have a sense of shame and the will to actually change things...and most don't.

Misinformation on social media is leading to real life suffering and horrific violence. There's technology out there that is rapidly advancing to the point where people can manipulate video and audio so it seems like someone is saying or doing things they aren't. Corrupt broadcasting companies are buying up news networks. Greed and corruption are destroying the planet, and those who are responsible for it don't care because they know they can avoid the worst of it.

I'm beginning to realize that most people aren't going to have the patience or will to fix small problems until we address the big ones. The root of most lessor evils are the greater evils, and it is impossible to fix the lessor evils without acknowledging the greater evils.

I can only hope the next generations are taught to value compassion, history, critical thinking, and humility and that will be enough to salvage what's left of Earth in the future. That people will have their needs met to the point were they aren't trapped in cycles of abuse, or won't cling to harmful and destructive delusions in their efforts to make sense of the world.

Despite everything, I do not hate humanity. Because I think to truly hate humanity would mean letting go of my ability to feel compassion for other human beings, and I'd rather die before that happens.

Don't get me wrong, I'm still a realist. I know a lot of marginalized people are going to suffer for a long time. I don't fault anyone for trying to cling to any happiness they have now.

so! i probably failed most of my classes but i'm too deppressed to care atm!!

I think I may start soley using waterfall for my personal posts. Twitter is too...public, Tumblr is too annoying. I like how there is an option here to make it so no one can reblog or interact with my posts.

starlights -

i really need to find a new friend group :(

starlights -

which really sucks because it's not the people themselves who are the problem, but what everyone in the group is into. i just can't be around this shit anymore for the sake of my mental health...

i really need to find a new friend group :(

"Yeah sure I know this person has have hurt you, but they haven't hurt me so I am unwilling and unable to empathize with your pain. :(

Doing so would mean I would have to do some self-reflection on my part and that's too much work and I love myself too much to aknowlege my flaws! :(

Sorry! (But not really!) Here's 50-something posts about what a Good and Reasonable Personβ„’ I am! :)" /s

I wonder if I should go back to identifying as my agab online again.

I thought I might be nonbinary, but I've found that I'm more confortable with my gender when I don't surround myself with people who'll judge me for my gender.

I don't know.

i'm not having a good time rn

depression is kicking my ass

i keep losing faith in humanity and myself

all of my dreams seem meaningless now

my goals have always about survival

or justifying my existence somehow

rather than what i want

but i don't know what i want

i don't think i should want

So. About today's discourse.

  • Abusers groom their character witnesses just as carefully as their victims.

  • Child abuse victims who want the abusers who have done unspeakably awful things to them be punished are not terrible people (especially if their abusers keep getting away with it because their family/comminuity are more concerned about their own reputation than helping trumatized children.)

As another year goes by, I find myself mourning the person I could have been yet again.

I started out with so much potential. I used to be such a smart, witty, and articulate person. But now whenever I speak, I sound so unintelligent. It is like there's some kind of fog around my mind. I feel like I'm stagnating.